Saturday, February 22, 2014

Dear papa,

I can’t believe it’s been 6 years.  Sometimes it feels longer, most times it feels shorter, but 6 years just doesn’t seem right.  I don’t think any number will actually ever feel right.  Like its hard to accept how one number can possibly measure all that was lost. 


So you have an apo now.  I’m watching her sleep as I type this and I can’t help but feel sad that she will never know what its like to have a lolo.  Drach lost his dad early too so nothing from that side either.  The lolas are amazing to be sure –mama is absolutely phenomenal - but lolos are great for little girls to have.  And I imagine you would have made a phenomenal one too.

I made a promise to myself the day I found out I was pregnant.  I said that I was going to make sure that my child would know who her grandfather was.  So I’ve made a mental note of all the stories that I want to share with her so she will know how funny, silly, honourable and, well, deaf you were. Hahaha. 

Anyway, I love you and I miss you terribly. And I hope that you are proud of the kind of parent I am turning out to be.