Wednesday, June 29, 2005

R.I.P. FUN (1975 - 2005)

There was a time when fun and i were inseperable. Where i was, fun would surely be soon after. In my most desperate of circumstances, fun would come running, eager to take my blues away. There were even times when others would look disapprovingly cos fun and i would insist on being together in such inopportune times.

Those days are gone now. And so soon after the demise of yet another dear friend, time. Fun and i took time for granted when we were together. How could i have known that losing one naturally meant losing the other.

To time. To fun. To rock n roll.

***** I am writing this at 6am at the office because i have ten minutes to spare before i leave for my 7am meeting in roxas. see what i mean. *****

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

sana someday...

i can rest naman.

im really so tired na eh. so very tired. working on weekends, not going home earlier than 1am in the past two weeks. really sticking to a one-hour lunch break. so tiring and, yes, unrewarding.

tomorrow i have a four-page supplement coming out in 2 publications. on thursday, after my press con in makati, i have to rush to subic to take care of my event there on friday. And im sure that despite my hard work and long hours, the slightest typo or the most insignificant shortcoming will be what my clients will remember.

it's a thankless job i tell you. WAHHHH!!!! (thats me throwing a fit)

Anyhoo, last night (actually this morning at 3), on my way back to the office from a meeting, i realized that i've been fairly lucky with my cabdrivers. I mean asking for additional fare on top of the meter rate is delightful compared to the "wanna sniff some ether so i can rape you and take all your money" types.

To top it off, stress doesnt seem to help in supressing the appetite. In fact, i think i eat more now that im stressed cos my mind is someplace else so i dont feel that im just snarfing down everything in sight. Like for instance this uraro in front of me. My god i really love uraro.

Okay. i just re-read what i wrote. you know what i am, im a leaper. from topic to topic with no transitions to connect my thoughts.

i really have ADD talaga. and by ADD i dont mean amazing dedes.

did i just actually write that?

Thursday, June 16, 2005

i suck because...

1. i wasnt able to watch the big-screen premiere of mansyon and big time, works of art of two of my greatest and most talented chums because i had a meeting in sm north.

2. i never got around to helping monster with the PR plan for big time (i so sowwy monstah. i so sowwy)

3. i had three dinners last night. i think im becoming a hobbit na.

4. ive been eating pringles cheezums the whole day despite my kabusugan.

5. i wasnt able to go to the wine tasting tonight because of work again.

as of this point, i just really want to go home.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

FOR THE RECORD:

I did not cry because i felt bad for the thief.

I did not cry because i felt sorry that she got caught.

I cried because i was genuinely hurt by the betrayal of someone i thought was a friend.

I cried because i sincerely wanted to understand why what happened happened.

And i know i seem wimpy and weird to everybody else and im sure that everybody else is fucking right cos, after all, every body else IS in my shoes. And I’m sure that the thief is probably snickering somewhere telling people "hey, you find maite alvarez and make her believe that you're her friend and then you steal from her cos she's the one who ends up crying pare"

IF SHE THINKS THAT THAN THATS HER PROBLEM.

THATS WHY SHE'S THE CHEAP SLUT THAT SHE IS!

AND IM NOT GONNA FEEL BAD ABOUT MYSELF BECAUSE I DONT MEASURE UP TO HER STANDARDS (OR OTHERS FOR THAT MATTER) OF WHAT A VICTIM SHOULD OR SHOULD NOT DO.

Im not letting her get away with anything. Forgiveness is one thing but justice is another.

I will make sure that she pays for what she did one way or another (and i just dont mean financially.)

I will not trust her again.

I cannot be her friend anymore.

BUT

i do feel bad and will continue to feel bad about the loss of a friendship that i thought was real. And, you know what, this may not even be the last time I cry about it.

SO FUCKING SUE ME!