ERM

to the only chick i will turn dike for :-)

well, you and jolie anyways.

welcome to blog.

www.galicious.blogspot.com

my feelings about punctuation (an indirect response to joels comment)

dont get me wrong. not that i have anything against capitals and punctuations (since i treat both of them with as much disrespect as the other.) i do have a valid reason for refusing to take it seriously.

one of my favorite anecdotes is one i read at a back cover of a book called "eats, shoots and leaves - the zero tolerance approach to punctuation" by lynne truss. I've downloaded it for your reference.

A panda walked into a cafe. He ordered a sandwich, ate it, then pulled out a gun and shot the waiter. 'Why?' groaned the injured man. The panda shrugged, tossed him a badly punctuated wildlife manual and walked out. And sure enough, when the waiter consulted the book, he found an explanation. 'Panda,' ran the entry for his assailant. 'Large black and white mammal native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves.'

hahahahahahahahhaahahahahahahahahah!!!

anyways, my attitude since i read that story has been "if im not sure i can do it properly, might as well not do it at all. unless i want some poor confused waiter in China shot dead by an upset panda."

Its better to be indifferent than stupid about these things.

if i were to orgy

i would love to be a groupie. not for a rock band or anything but for a movie cast. (would the word still apply then?)

anyway, the 5 movies that i would love to be a groupie for:

1. Oceans eleven - Andy Garcia, Matt Damon, Brad Pitt and Joshua Jackson (i pass on clooney)
2. Love actually - Hugh Grant, Colin Firth and that delicious italian that laura linney was in love with
3. Red dragon - Ralph Fiennes, Edward Norton, Gary Oldman
4. SWAT - Colin Farrell, Olivier Martinez
5. Pirates of the Carribean - Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightly

A spotless mind

4 days ago, on our way back from tagaytay, I was telling joel how I felt I wasted a good two years of my life with the asshole and that I want those two years of my life back. In my head, there were so many things I could have done in those two years instead of building a future I evidently would never have.

A very subdued jim carrey knocked some sense into me last night.

Am I really ready to erase all traces of the bad knowing that it will likewise erase all memories of the good?

The last scene, where carrey was ‘okay’ to fall in love again despite knowing how it will eventually end up, that was an absolutely beautiful moment. A great testimony to the stubbornness of the human heart and mans faith in love, hopeless as the situation seems.

Stupidity and bravery - We need both to trust and to love and to live.

Good film.

Fearing Alzheimer’s

I was home early last night. as I plan to be for the next two weeks to help me avoid carb-temptation as I start, yet again, another diet. South beach this time.

I decided that its time for some serious reading again. None of these novels, best categorized as cute, that I’ve been reading these past months.

Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged, a book I’ve vowed to read ever since (along with the Bible and War and Peace) was my first candidate. I couldn’t find it. What I found instead were dust-covered copies of Camus’ The Plague and Dostoevsky’s Notes from the Underground.

Two books I know, for a fact, I read in college.

Two works of art, in fact, that Im certain I’ve written reviews for for one philosophy course or another.

Two literary pieces that I remember enjoying and learning from.

AND

Two stories that I absolutely have no recollection of as I blog.

So I scanned through Underground last night. déjà vu was what it felt like. A place I’ve been and abandoned without any real or vivid memory.

Scary thing is this is not the first time this has happened.

Many times, I’d be halfway reading a book or watching a movie when I realize that I’ve read/seen it before.

It scares me shitless.

My grandmother spent the last years of her life battling, no – wrong word, surrendering to Alzheimer’s.

I hear its hereditary.

And Im scared shitless.

Bury the dead. It stinks up the joint.

this is one of the better lessons i picked-up from a tom cruise flick. makes plenty of sense. at least, it does to me. and i think i'l put it to practice right about now.

it doesnt matter how much time you spend obsessing over the things you did or did not do. Or the infinite possibilities that play out in your head had you done things differently. i can coulda, woulda, shoulda my sweet fat ass till im blue in the face but it won't make an iota of difference to my here and now.

what's done is done.

bury it.

cry if you must... but bury it and walk away.

Enough. Enough now.

my feelings exactly.

an ode to bachii

to the tune of another day in paradise

He is out on a night with the chums
You can see he’s not comfy
He smiles but the look in his eyes
Tells you loud he is sleepy

Oh think twice
Before you spend another day with him to socialize
Oh think twice
Its just another day for him
to wish and pray nalang he dies

You attempt, you really do try
Get to know him bit better
But the truth is you know deep inside
He just wants to go homeler

Oh think twice
Before you spend another day with him to socialize
Oh think twice
Its just another day for him,
To wish and pray nalang he dies

putting things in perspective

i've often been asked by several different people why i never seem to get angry. they're right. i rarely do. i have learned early in life that my anger only upsets one person, ME. and i have decided that i love myself way too much to upset me.

when life gets in a whack, as it usually does every couple of days or so, i take two steps back and try to see the bigger picture. generally, i ask myself "this thing that is irking the bejeesus out of me, will it matter at all this time next year?" most often the answer is no, so i let it slide, smile and move on.

like this morning for instance.

the first email i read was from a client who was, apparently, unhappy with the writing of a press release. she wanted a little more.... heart. initially of course, my reaction was "its a fucking press release ma'am. we are not trying to win a goddamned pulitzer here!"

two steps back.

this time next year, i will be thinner.

and that is what really matters.

an ode to leoyauc

to the tune of against all odds...

Why did you just walk away from us?
Just disappeared for many days
All we wanted was to see him go
Instead you gave us space

Leoy you know naman
We didn’t mean no harm at all

When we take a look at you now
Sometimes we see a trace
A look that reminds us
That behind that smile
You have been through bitter days

When you take a look at us now
Do you secretly make a fist
When you are out with us
Do you secretly want to box a smuchies

When you take a look at us now…
When you take a look at chums now….

mush monster

thats what mamu calls me after my rather infamous 'amore' blog. i think il take it. no point fighting off who i am anymore.

i am the queen of mush. there. i said it.

anyway, the blog actually started off as a list of my favorite lines from movies. it focused on love eventually cos rain does that to me and it was pouring thursday.

anyway, my top ten favorite lines from movies; (the lines that either gave me goose-bumps or made me wish i thought of them, most of which may actually be meaningless to those who have not watched the movies)

1. The Godfather II, Al Pacino - you're nothing to me now fredo. not a brother, not a friend.

2. Bonfire of the vanities, tom hanks - its lonely at the top. but what a view.

3. Steel magnolias, shirley mclaine - you are a boil on the butt of humanity.

4. Return of the king, Aragorn - My friends, you bow to no one.

5. The usual suspects, kevin spacey - the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making the world believe that he didnt exist.

6. The Godfather I, Al Pacino - I'm with you now pop

7. The Godfather III, Andy Garcia - Love somebody else

8. Devil's advocate, Al Pacino - Vanity, my favorite sin

9. The return of the king, samwise gamgee - i cannot carry it for you, but i can carry you

10. Thelma and Louise, thelma or louise - You get what you settle for

advertising schmadvertising

im not in advertising.  i say that with neither pride nor regret.  unlike some friends, i dont have any passionate feelings about the industry.  its there.  sometimes what they do matters.  sometimes it doesnt.

today, i attended a whole day seminar conducted by three industry legendaries.  2 of them have proven their worth to me today just by being wonderful speakers.  The ones who did are raul castro and emily abrera.  they almost made me want to shift to creatives in the off chance that i might someday work with them or, at least, watch them present.

i love pitch presentations.  done by very good presenters and backed by excellent materials, presentations transform into theatre with really good visuals. 

speaking of theatre, the afternoon was a workshop conducted by the tanghalang pilipino.  i was in the group taught by robby guevarra, who also turned out to be fanstastic.

lots of brilliant people out there.  brilliant at what they do.  and, most importantly, brilliant people who love what they do.

maybe someday someone will look at me and say the same thing.  

if i can just figure out what it is im brilliant at already.   

joels beck and call girl

thats what i've become today.  actually, thats what i've been for the past week.  the go-to chum to keep him company when he's alone and waiting for tracy to come back from QC.  i don't mind keeping him company. after all, he is my #4 fan.  I owe him something somewhat because of that.

right now, we're at the e-lounge using public computers, one seat apart, chatting.  its the first time i get to hear the audibles of YM beta.  

great fun!  

  


 

Amore

 
i think it was in january of this year when i had that conversation with therese.  we were talking about how, at this age, people have probably already met the love of their lives and, in all likelihood, i will only be someone somebody just settles for.  its not a part im looking forward to take but a part i know il take anyway cos i'm yet too scared to make solitary an option.

she asked me what it was i wanted really.  i thought long and hard before i gave an answer.

"i want to be someone's answered prayer."

that would be nice, wouldn't it?  for someone to thank God every night cos he's sleeping next to you.  i realized right after i said it of course, how more screenplay-ish it sounded than realistic.  makes me wish that i were in a romantic movie instead.

anyways, my top 10 movie quotable love quotes;

1.  As good as it gets, Jack Nicholson -  I might be the only person on the face of the earth that knows you're the greatest woman on earth. I might be the only one who appreciates how amazing you are in every single thing that you do and in every single thought that you have, and how you say what you mean, and how you almost always mean something that's all about being straight and good. I think most people miss that about you, and I watch them, wondering how they can watch you bring their food, and clear their tables and never get that they just met the greatest woman alive. And the fact that I get it makes me feel good, about me.

2.  He said, she said, Kevin Bacon - I dont want to be with anyone else but you and i dont want you to be with anyone else but me.

3.  When a man loves a woman, Andy Garcia - when my wife hurts, i want to say "hi, are you okay?  is there something i can do."  so fuck me.

4.  Say anything, John Cusack (to the dad) - What I really want to do with my life - what I want to do for a living - is I want to be with your daughter. I'm good at it.

5.  City of angels, Meg Ryan - When they ask me what I liked best, I'll say it was you.

6.  When harry met sally, Billy Crystal - I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.

7.  A beautiful mind, Russell Crowe - I'm mortified, petrified, stupefied by you.

8.  Sleepless in seattle, Tom Hanks - it was a million tiny little things that, when you added them all up, they meant we were suppose to be together... and I knew it. I knew it the very first time I touched her. It was like coming home... only to no home I'd ever known... I was just taking her hand to to help her out of a car and I knew. It was like... magic.

9.  The princess bride, Cary Elwes - As you wish

9.  Chasing amy, Ben Affleck- I love you. And not in a friendly way, although I think we're great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy-dog way, although I'm sure that's what you'll call it. And it's not because you're unattainable. I love you. Very simple, very truly. You're the epitome of every attribute and quality I've ever looked for in another person. I know you think of me as just a friend, and crossing that line is the furthest thing from an option you'd ever consider. But I had to say it. I can't take this anymore. I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can't look into your eyes without feeling that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are. I know this will probably queer our friendship -no pun intended- but I had to say it, because I've never felt this before, and I like who I am because of it. And if bringing it to light means we can't hang out anymore, then that hurts me. But I could'nt allow another day to go by without getting it out there, regardless of the outcome, which by the look on your face is to be the inevitable shoot-down. And I'll accept that. But I know some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there is a moment of hesitiation, that means you feel something too. All I ask is that you not dismiss that -at least for ten seconds- and try to dwell in it. there is'nt another soul on this fucking planet who's ever made me half the person I am when I'm with you, and I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next plateau. Because it's there between you and me. you can't deny that. And even if we never speak again after tonight, please know that I'm forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me, which -while I do appreciate it- I'd never need a painting of birds bought at a diner to remind me of.

where have all the zagus gone?

 

i was at the mall with adi two days ago when i suddenly had an unshakable craving for zagu (mocha flavor.)  it was rather odd since i only had it less than 10 times when it grew wild and abundant (very much like my body hair) in the metro.

i was never really a fan of the icy-pearly delights.  i enjoyed it when i had it but i never lined up for it or anything.  In 2001, pop business rolled out the latest bandwagon - and 82% of entrepreneurs with capital jumped in.  Like mushrooms it sprouted.  At any given time, you could find two within a 20-meter radius.  It wasn't a health treat.  Truth be told, it wasnt that fantastic tasting either.  But it was new and it was everywhere so pinoys drank and drank and drank until...........  well.... until they stopped.

and so monday night, when i desperately wanted one, there was none.

10 things i want back from the food industry:

1.  Magnolia chocolait in a bottle - i dont remember much from my childhood but holding, shaking and drinking from a bottle of this one stands out in lights.

2.  Horlicks - are you still out there?

3.  Cola candy

4.  Mushroom burger in makati

5.  the original mojos - none of these cute spud slices devoid of taste

6.  Mcdonalds milk shake - i've read enough archie comics to know that its what goes with burgers and fries.  bring it back.

7.  Lays salt and vinegar potato chips - which is probably still out there, i just cant find it anywhere.

8.  the shawarma fever - about 5 years prior to zagu, there was shawarma with a stand in every street corner to prove it.

9.  lipps candy - the best lipstick on earth

10.  magnolia chocolait in a bottle - deserves mentioning twice

she bangs...

 
i am very afraid.  now that the novelty of having bangs is gone, i imagine im looking more and more like nats.  which isnt necessarily bad, its just not what i want to look like at this fragile state of my life.

keeping the playing field level (aka I LOVE ADI TOO!)

 
i love adi so much i would gladly, willingly and whole-heartedly give up my zinger for him and buy him a couple more for good measure.

sorry trace, i have to be in the race here.

my power of choice (a series initiated by monster)

 
puchasing power. lots and lots of it.  of the eternal, perpetual and evarlasting kind.     

buddha bless me yet again por favor.

love actually

 
i saw this movie six months after it came out in the cinemas.  i had to use my brothers laptop to watch it since our cheapo dvd player, feeling all arrogant and stuff, refuses to play pirated copies.  

my first thought after i saw it was fuck, i have to revise my top ten movie list again. 

hence, my top ten movies

1.  the godfather trilogy 
2.  the lord of the rings trilogy
3.  moulin rouge
4.  shawshank redemption
5.  love actually
6.  usual suspects
7.  beauty and the beast
8.  as good as it gets
9.  best in show
10. steel magnolias

my top ten light love happy-ending movies

1.  love actually (well, except for emma thompson noh)
2.  beauty and the beast
3.  as good as it gets
4.  notting hill
5.  american president
6.  when harry met sally
7.  while you were sleeping 
8.  he said, she said. 
9.  clueless
10.  pretty woman

the alter ego of pleasant

 
its not easy being a willful pollyana.  i've been one for the past ten years or so. 

depression hit me at 18-19, i was an inconsolable wreck for no good and obvious reason.  i had no idea what was up my ass so, naturally, i didn't know how to remedy it.  i would cry at the drop of a pin, in the middle of a volleyball game, anytime, anywhere. 

one morning, before waking up, before i even opened my eyes, tears were already falling in rivers.  that was my rock bottom.

that same day, i vowed to myself never to be miserable again.  happiness, i decided, was in my full control and the only  way to get there was self-delusion.

self-delusion.  i have read the book and written my own interpretation of it.  its what keeps this girl happy. 

you're not stupid or naive.  you see the bad but you dont allow your mind to process it.  you put on your best pair of rose-colored glasses and focus on the good and tell yourself repeatedly that this is the only thing that matters because this is what makes you happy. 

most times, it helps you sleep better at night.

some times, the demons come and you're forced to face them because you're just too tired to fight them off already. 

and in these few moments of weakness, life shoves reality down your throat and bullies you into swallowing it.

and you reach the conclusion, after 29 years of observation and experimentation, that life fundamentally sucks big time.